Prescription: Girls Weekend - Why Your Friends Are Good for Your Health

It takes a lot of planning to organize a weekend away with four women, months of preparation actually. Two days planned for the end of September at my family's cottage, it meant we had to start checking our work and home calendars in early summer. By August we were firming up dates, then planning menus, and rides. Finally, it all culminated in roughly 40 hours of good food and great laughs.

These "Weekends" have become a semi-annual event for us. Usually, it is a cheap getaway at a cottage, or a local hotel. We once did a Niagara wine tour (which was so amazing, we might go back).

The four of us started working together at CKY-TV in the late 90s. Rachel, Eleanor, Joanne and I, have grown together in our professional, and personal lives. These women are my closest friends, but sometimes life prevents us from staying closely connected. We have busy careers and busy homes. We text regularly, and we see each other for the odd dinner out, but it's really these two days away, when we truly have time to catch up. As each "Girls Weekend" comes to a close, we often say to each other, "Thank You. I needed that."

It turns out it is true; we actually do need time together.

Kim Bochinski is a Winnipeg-based professional certified counsellor. She says healthy friendships make us feel safe, validated, and accepted.

"As women we wear so many hats. Your friends help you remember what it feels like to be yourself."

Friends are good for our mental and physical health; Bochinski says friendship sparks a chemical reaction in our brains.

"When you are with friends, they are happy to see you, and you are happy to see them. That actually affects the front part of your brain, and you experience joy."

Bochinski categorizes three general types of friendships:

• The Mentor - This friend "makes us better". She is willing to take you under her wing and watch out for you.

• The Same-Level Friend - This friend is often at the same point in life as you. She will share similar goals and challenges.

• The Friend in Need - This friend relies on you for support and guidance.

  
  

"To have a balance of all of these types of friendships is important, because if you're unbalanced, and all you have is a friend who you are helping all of the time, or if you are the one always receiving and never giving, you don't really grow."

It's true that your friends help you grow, and I believe you grow with your friend groups. From your high school besties to the gang from your first job, the moms who freeze together during hockey seasons, and book club confidantes. For me, each friend who has come into my life, is there at the right time.

Bochinski says acknowledging the diverse personalities within friendships is crucial. It’s important to understand not everyone finds it effortless to spend extended periods with friends. We need to recognize the individuality of each person. While some friends may prefer a weekend getaway, others may be content with a brief check-in every few weeks. This could be a simple phone call, or you can show them you're thinking of them by texting a few favorite photos or sending flowers.

"Appreciation is important...Remembering good times is important, but different personalities will have different needs," Bochinski said.

This fab-four-friend group also has unique personalities; fun, serious, smart, dramatic, but I feel we complement each other.

I will be forever appreciative of what these women have brought into my life. Wisdom, laughter, and apparently, good health. Thank you, my friends.